Part I
It was a dark and stormy night. The world-famous WW2 codebreaker furiously twiddled his moustache. Suddenly, a shout – “I’ve solved the Voynich!” It was the television! A small boy and his beagle were smiling at the camera, holding a book up. They had “proved it was a hoax”. This meant one thing: war! The codebreaker slammed the door and drove to the library.

Part II
Seven hundred years earlier, Knights Templar pounded the monastery door. Roger Bacon answered. “We’ll taketh that”, said the knights, grabbing the mysterious book from his hands. “My secrets are safe with you idiots”, sneered the codemaker monk.

Part III
The security guard approached. The codebreaker was in his pyjamas, waiting at the library’s front gate. “You’ll have to wait till morning, sir”, said the guard. A shot rang out. The guard slumped. The codebreaker hid the body in a snowdrift. The history graduate walked warily past the man in bloodstained pyjamas on her way home. The boy on TV carried on smiling.

Part IV
The Knights Templar couldn’t decipher the book. “Torture him!”, the Grand Master screamed. They tried, but Bacon had a heart attack and died. Nobody would ever know. Or would they? And then the whole Templar Order was suppressed. Or was it?

Part V
The gate opened, and the codebreaker ran in past the history graduate, again. The librarian shrugged. But where was the security guard? The codebreaker sped through all the pages one last time, until – yes, there it was! A bloody fingerprint, overlooked by everyone. It wasn’t a hoax! Outside, the librarian noticed the trail of blood and called the police. The dog smiled even harder.

Part VI
Leon Battista Alberti borrowed the book from the Vatican, his oily fingerprints messing up the radiocarbon dating. Suddenly, a thud! Alberti lay unconscious in the street, mugged: the thief ran away with his prize, for his great-grandchildren to sell to the Holy Roman Emperor, and from there to Athanasius Kircher in 1665, the Jesuit archives, and then Wilfrid Voynich in 1912.

Part VII
Bang! The codebreaker lay shot, slumped by the book, his vividly red blood mingling with the ink, the paint and the blood spatter from Alberti’s head. His life ebbing away, he suddenly realized: nobody would ever know. They’d all think it simply a hoax, forever. He lifted his hands to the sky and shouted “Noooooooo!” The boy and the dog danced on top of the kennel, one last time.

THE END

9 thoughts on “Snoopy’s Ultimate Voynich Novel…

  1. Hi Nick.

    Nobody and never decode the Voynich manuscript. This is a very complex cipher.
    The manuscript describes a secret history of the Czech lands. Describes the straggle for power and control. In many places in the manuscript is described the Jan Hus not died.
    This is very delicate topic Czech history.
    Hus lived for many years, but under a different identity.
    ————————————————————————–

    Read what I write in block Rosettes ( Rozety 86 V).
    There is for example written. At the top right of rosettes. Turn the rosette and see the human figure. The figure holds in his hands two things. Water and monkey. These are the two attributes of the Rosenberg family.

  2. Diane O'Donovan on April 23, 2013 at 2:36 pm said:

    Professor, if no one can ever decipher it, how can you know what it’s about?

    And if you don’t know what it’s about, how can you be sure it’s in Czech?

    Many people must have read your web-site. Perhaps someone has written in English about what you say?

  3. Lady Diana.

    I’ ve deciphered. So I know what the manuscript contains a secret. Manuscript describec the various of the Rosenbergs. I translated about half the manuscript. So I know what it contains. It also describes the death of the Danisch astologer a alchemist Tycho Brahe. Describes the death of a young Czech king Ladislaus. Describes the production of various poisons. Describes the struggle of Czech nobility estates ( property). Political influence. etc.

    I worked on the manuscript for many years. The manuscript are various names. These are the names of Czech history.

    Cipher is in Czech language. Secondly, it is used Jewish Gematria.
    Many people have read my website. But the code is very difficult. The algorithm is very complicated. On page 116 it is written, what to do with the manuscript for the operation to continue reading.
    In the written text is necessary to complete many characters. What kind of character is is written on page 116.

  4. bdid1dr on April 24, 2013 at 12:32 am said:

    Oh dear! I can just see you and your child huddled at the table with the Sunday paper spread in front of you. Do you get Snoopy way over there (across the pond)?

    Do you, by any chance, have a “Red Baron” helmet on hand–er–head? Don’t forget the goggles, if you decide to take off any moment now!

    beedee 🙂

  5. Ivan Y on April 24, 2013 at 6:02 am said:

    There’s one small error in the title of this post. It should read “Outline of Dan Brown’s Next Book.”

  6. Avi Wollman on April 24, 2013 at 10:57 am said:

    And then it was found and actually decoded just to find instructions on how to life to the ripe old age of 70.

  7. Diane O'Donovan on April 24, 2013 at 12:38 pm said:

    Dear Professor
    I thank you for your reply.
    One of the first people to give their opinion about the manuscript thought it suggested Kabbala which of course is part of non-mainstream Judaism, and does use gematria, so you are not entirely alone.

    It sounds as if you think the person a skillful mathematician.

  8. Ivan: Snoopy vs Dan Brown? No contest!

  9. Lady Diana.

    The manuscript is not about mathematics. Check out the handwriting 2R ( page). The symbolic plant has a root ( ROOT).
    The root consists of 4 letters. Why is that ? ( 4 LETTERS )!

    Gematria number 3. The letters are at the root ( C,,G,,S,,L,,). This shows the author at the beginning of the manuscript. Otherwise, far the first time. The root of the Hebrew says ( JADA). Jada is to know. ( Jada = Know)
    This root is determined by Gematria. I’m on my blog shows the correct gematria. Rosenberg was Jewish. Rosenberg was first in the kingdom.

    Written text in the manuscript is not complete.
    To the text must still enroll characters. What the characters is written on page 116.
    Without supplement can not read the handwriting.
    It is important to add the characters. ( To the text of the manuscript).

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